Five years later, and how our homeschool has changed.

The other day, Facebook reminded me that we started this incredible, crazy adventure of homeschooling five years ago!

It has been in some ways just like I thought, and in other ways, not at all how I imagined.

We have run the gambit of curriculum, field trips, school styles, children styles, ups and down, but in the end, I'm thankful for what we are doing as a family. 

When I first had Samuel, I knew I would want to home school.  Convincing my husband, however, was another story.  We started doing this because I was bored with a toddler and he LOVED to learn!  We figured we would do our own free/library/printable curriculum and just get him through the preschool phase until he went to a good school.  What started off as a way for me to structure our day a little bit, because a new love of teaching and learning.

I have gone through my doubts, trepidation, and changes over the years.  At times Samuel went to private school part time and homeschooled part time.  At times they were 100% homeschooled.  At times we were homeschooling other families with us.  At times we were 100% private school (but I was still their teacher thankfully), and now we are back to 100% at home, with lots of other activities and trips.

I have tried my run with curriculum I grew up with, and some I loved, some I didn't.  I have found styles that suit our children and family at different stages, and I'm thankful for our flexibility to change as we need to as a family and do what is best for our children in their various phases of life.

I could post all day about why I love My Fathers World, why we switched to Master books, why I don't push handwriting classes, why we do co op at times and not at others, etc, etc, etc.


This is all to say that the reason we home school is because our family is constantly changing and evolving, and in the long and short of it I've learned a few gems.

1) Be willing to change and grow as your family needs it. 

We do not stay the same as moms, our children do not stay the same as people.  The ability to adapt to what we need and what they need is one of the many blessings of homeschooling.

2) Find your encouragement! 

There will be the naysayers, the hard seasons, and the times you want to ship them off to school so you can clean your house and rest for a week.  Remember that although it is physically and mentally draining, it is a season.  Remember WHY you started homeschooling.  Remember the precious memories with your family.  Find those other moms who love, encourage, and lift you up with Bible, hugs, and smiles when you feel you can't keep going.

3) Teach to your child and don't sweat the small stuff.

I have three very unique boys, and what works for one doesn't work for them all.  Don't stress when one was reading at three and one is still not caring at all at 5.  Don't stress when one is a book worm and one hates even the simplest book.  Remember that they have different personalities, and in the end the love, grace, and compassion you have with your children with teach them way more than any curriculum will.

4) Keep GOD the focus and the rest will follow.

Although last, this is by far the most important.  I learned to quit stressed every thing academic (even though we still think they are very important) and teach our children about God, and keep the Bible our focus.  This teaches more than anything else can. 

5) In the end, your kids will grow up, and it will be okay.

Mom, remember that during this long, painful, and sometimes exhausting time of life, you are raising the next generation of daddies, mommies, men and women.  Sometimes you just need to embrace the hugs, the messy papers, and the moments where they finally "get it" with their math!  At the end teach what you can, but if they aren't the next spelling bee champion, or even if they are, that's not what's important. 

We home school so we can instill and teach Godly character into a generation that is greatly lacking.  Pray, love, and rely on God, and in the end it will be okay.

Here are some sweet memories (out of my thousands!!) of our homeschooling over the years.

Music Love, Teaching, and Learning. BEST job ever!!

I've had lots of jobs.. Lots.  Bookstore, Clothing Stores, Army, CNA, etc, etc, etc.

Outside of being a mom (and a homeschool mom) I LOVE being a music teacher!!

I've been a "real" teacher, and I've learned a LOT about why I love teaching music.

Music teaching brings out a love and energy from kids you don't get anywhere else.  It teaches kids to work consistently for something and that they CAN do it!

I could go all day and tell you how music can improve their memory, help with concentration, improves their academics, creates self discipline, etc.  BUT nothing I say can show you what I see in the studio and homes of my students.



I see confidence build.  I see kids get excited over their success and achievements.  I see kids find the joy and spark in what they are learning.

Being a music teacher is one of the greatest things I can do.  It's not about my ability to perform music, but I am grateful for the fact I get to help encourage and nourish the creativity in children.  I'm not going to find the next Mozart, but I can teach a shy girl that she can be successful.  I can help an autistic child express their emotions.  I can help an ADHD child focus and concentrate in an area they can succeed in.  I see the toddlers burst with energy!

There is so much that music does.  Music is the heartbeat of life.  Music connects people across languages, cultures, and ability.  I am forever thankful that I get to share my passion and joy with others.  It's my small way of adding a little bit of color and happiness to other people's lives.

There is no greater joy than to see my children serving God.  But teaching music and creating that joy comes a pretty close second.

Music is how I am able to serve in ministry, it's how my husband and I are able to work together.  Music is how I deal with depression.  Music is how I express my extreme happiness!



Thank you to those that let me share my joy with you and your families.

The face of depression, and the side you don't see.

Do you know what you don't see??  Depression.

See my smiling face?  See how happy my social media is?  See how many awesome friends I have?  See how cute my makeup is?

This is what depression looks like.

What you don't see is when the pain is so bad I can't get out of bed.

What you don't see is when my depression overtakes me and I cry for hours

What you don't see is when my anxiety takes over.

Now, this is not about just me or a "pity me" post.  This is a reminder that not everyone "looks" depressed.  That mom with her new baby?  She might be struggling with Post Pardum that you don't know.

See that mom without a baby?  She's had two miscarriages and you ask her why she doesn't have a family yet.

See that smiling couple?  They are struggling and hurting.

Yes, I'm thankful for my friends.  I have an amazing family, and amazing job, and an amazing homeschooling life.  

But there is a lot that still hits me on my bad days.

Depression does not define me, but it still hurts.   It's a permanent part of my life due to the chemical and hormonal imbalance I struggle with. (and the multiple traumas at this point)  It's a daily and life long balance of mental and physical health for the rest of my life.  

But the days you don't hear from me?  It's probably because I"m too exhausted to keep checking on everyone else.  The days I smile but look empty?  It's because I'm too worn to keep going that day.

I've written other blogs on how I cope with depression, and yes, I still do those things.  No, this is not a cry for help or concern.

Sometimes it's just a good reminder that others are hurting.  

The person that is always reaching out to you might just need someone to reach out back to her.  

Check on your strong friends, for very often they are there for others, and people forget to check on them.

When you are struggling remember:

Still GET UP every day.  Even when it hurts

You DO matter to others

Take care of yourself.

Hiding out with chocolate and Netflix is ok but don't forget to take a shower too at some point.

Traveling with my kids and why I find it so important!

Traveling with my kids is something I've found more important as they grow older.

Some of the best memories I have with my family is our long road trips.  In our old travel van in hot summers and looking out the windows seeing what there was to see.

For me it was the best because I had two weeks with my parents and we got to explore and learn new things.  Now, for my kids, I'm sure they won't look back with the same memories I did, but this is not for them, it's for me.

I am forever grateful for my memories with my parents growing up, and I'm thankful for creating new memories with my kids.  Some trips are like our CA trip where we did Grand Canyon and Yosemite and Disneyland, but others are like our NY trip this last month.

This trip was more about seeing family, experiencing snow, and getting family time together.

These trips do many things:

1) It unplugs us from our normal commitments and schedules.

It's so easy to get caught up in the every day chores, commitments, and sometimes drudgery of life.  Getting away with no dishes, no school, and no daily commitments can be a good way to just reset and unplug as a family.

2) Learn about other areas and cultures.

Even though we stay in the US (for now anyway) our kids have met people from all walks and styles of life.  They have spoken with people all around the world and have heard their stories.  It also lets them try food and styles from other parts of the United States.  This last trip, they got to fully enjoy the SNOW.  For these Texas kids, that was a major life event.  It let them understand why some people have different references for Winter than we do.  It gave them a perspective that did not previously have.

3) Gives us family time

Granted, we get a LOT of family time with homeschooling and being with our kids 24/7, but it's different when we travel.  We talk about what we are traveling to, thinking about, or learning about every day instead of getting caught up in the day-to-day of regular life.  We learn to live with a lot less for periods of time.  Less stuff, and more time.

When you are in close quarters for any length of time... you really get to bond.  There is no hiding out.

4) It gives us memories.

Yes, we all have memories as children, but I love that the most memorable ones are the things we do outside our normal lives.  I pray that my kids look back on these adventures and learn to find the adventure in their lives too when they some day become parents.  I want them to seek adventure and cherish family.


I'm thankful for the life that my husband and I have and that we are able to travel and do things we wouldn't typically be able to do.  It doesn't come without a lot of hardship in other areas, but I'm very thankful for the good and the breaks we get in between.

My babies were babies too...

Hello everyone. 

Warning for those who have lost to miscarriage, this post may be upsetting, although not graphic.


I normally never post political anything, so this is not that area, even though some may see it as such.

It is also very rare that I post about my twins, although people close to us know about them and their impact on our family.

I just wanted to take a moment to share my heart especially with all I've been seeing lately about abortion.

I have heard it ALL.  Why people have abortions, and this is not what I'm here to discuss.  People know how I feel about it.  I believe strongly that a baby is a human from the moment of conception and abortion is the murdering of those helpless babies.  I don't hate those that have had abortions, but I do deeply mourn for them and their babies.  However, this is not what I'm here to talk about.

As few people know, when Ezekiel was 8 months old I found out I was pregnant.

This was not planned, and it was very shocking.  I was so much in shock I became angry!  I was angry at the fact I was already struggling physically and emotionally and now would have four children under four years old even though I had done things to prevent my pregnancy.

For me abortion has never been a consideration ever.  Even when I was recommended to for my health.  Even when people told me how much better for me it would be.  This was even before I had ever lost children.

For me the thought of a miscarriage or loss never occurred to me to happen.  I had three healthy babies and perfect pregnancies and easy deliveries. 

With the twins I didn't even rush for a doctor appointment because I knew I was pregnant, the clinic had confirmed it, but I had never had any issues before either.   Due to insurance issues, it took until I was almost 16 weeks to get me in for my first "heartbeat" check and ultrasound.  I was having morning sickness, I was still working full time, and I was still taking care of babies at home and my husband, and dealing with a lot of other things at the time.

I had felt baby movement (although I felt it was crazy early) and I knew that there was a sweet child inside of me.  Until you feel your baby, see the heartbeat, you may not understand that from the moment you are pregnant, you have a child.  You are a mother.  You love your sweet baby.

The biggest shock came to me when during the ultrasound (that I was expecting it to be normal and basic) they told me I was having TWINS~!

This put me in a whirlwind of emotions and thoughts.  I immediately called my husband and told him and started already mentally thinking of plans, names, and everything this would entail.

Very shortly however, I realized something was wrong.  They brought in three different doctors to come check on the babies.  There was no heartbeat on either baby.

This was the time my doctors gently told me my babies had not survived.  Yes, survived.  They had been alive, and growing, and moving.... and now they had died.  No heartbeat, and no more growth. 

They sent me home and hoped that I would continue the miscarriage at home.   After a day I went back to the hospital to be induced because I could not mentally wrap my mind around the idea that I had just lost two babies.  Two, unplanned, miracles that I never got a chance to hold.

After being induced, and going through hours of painful labor I delivered two babies.  These babies were smaller than my hand, but they were still my babies.  They still had all their organs, body parts, and were completely human.

We did name them, we had a funeral for them, and we buried them.  At 16 weeks, we had two baby boys.  Gabriel and Michael. 

Although no one knew my boys, and we never had a chance to hear them laugh or cry.  Even though their brothers never got to meet them, we still had two precious boys.  Do we understand why we lost them? No.  I probably never will understand.  But knowing they are in heaven brings some comfort.  Knowing they never had to suffer or be in pain, and all they ever knew was my comforting heartbeat and voice helps a little bit.

I just wanted to say to people who may not understand.  Even at 16 weeks, my sweet boys had foot prints.  They had a weight.  They had a height.  Albeit, very small, our twins are forever part of our hearts and our memories. 

It also helped me to never take for granted the babies I do have.  Since then we have lost our 21 month old daughter, and we lost another baby at 7 weeks to a miscarriage.  Even at 7 weeks, that baby, Angel, had an impact on our family.

Pray and love those babies.  Pray for the moms struggling with the right decisions, and pray for our nation that God would work wonders.

My heart is grieved, and I honestly wish I personally could take in all those unwanted children.  Go and make a change, be the difference, and pray earnestly.

I just wanted to say thank you for those that pray and love on us.

Thank you for listening to my story.

My Mom Tribe, I thank you!

I'm not a huge fan of the "mom tribe" idea, but in all reality, yes, I do have one and I am thankful for them.

Sometimes my "tribe" is the moms I meet with at the park, sometimes it's my BEST friend doing a coffee date with me, and sometimes it's texts of encouragement because we all have busy lives and kids and can't always meet up.  I am so thankful for the variety of my "mom tribe" because in reality, we all need that encouragement and uplifting we get.

For me the mom tribe is how I keep my sanity on the long days.

My husband is my best friend, but as a man cannot understand why I get stressed out with laundry, or why my youngest has backwards shoes all the time, or why I am crying over burnt toast when I have a fresh loaf of bread.

Moms, you get me.

I'm not talking the high drama, make you feel worse moms.  I'm talking about the loving, accepting, and "Yes, I've been there too" moms.  I'm talking about the friend who hands you tissues when you cry over a missing sock and helps you fold laundry.  I'm talking about the friend who is there at the hospital during the rough times, and loves you through the crazy.

Sometimes my "tribe" isn't even the people I see day to day.

Sometimes it's the praying moms.  The moms who love me from a distance and pray for me and encourage me even though they can't be here to hug me.

Sometimes it's not even the "MOMS" at all!  Sometimes it's just the sweet ladies who are there for each other.

I'm thankful for you all.

Thank you for being there during the good and bad times.  Thank you for loving me through depression and grief and silliness.  Thank you for not judging me when my kids are different than yours. 

We all need love and grace from each other.  As moms, we get that a little easier than others.

Be that mom for someone else and say Thank You to those who are there for you!!

Two are better than one; because they have a good reward for their labour.

Ecclesiastes 4:9 | KJV 

Peace with less

So this year I've been working on minimizing.  This doesn't just mean "less stuff" but I've also been reducing our commitments, extracurriculars, etc. 

I've already noticed a difference in stress! 

1) Meals and Diet

Now when we go to the store we have gone down to a basic diet (Whole 30 inspired), which means it's so much faster.  Focusing on meat, veggies, and fruit, means no more wandering every single aisle buying impulse on things I never use and then regretting it.  This has reduced our trips, simplified our meals, and overall reduced stress with that area!!

2) School

Yes, according to social media we look busy, but you don't see behind the scenes. 

Our mornings are slower, where we focus on chores and homeschooling.  I also reduced the schooling pace so we end up with less stress, and actually get MORE done, because I'm not rushing and stressing over every little thing.  Weirdly to me, slowing down our school actually made it more fulfilling and less stressful.  The kids are learning more, and we have less meltdowns. 

My new mantra "don't sweat the small stuff'"!  Now I don't have to hammer in something until they get it.  I just go slow and steady and when it clicks, I let it click.  It's amazing the happy learning I now get from my kids!

3) Extra curriculars

I am that mom that wants to do EVERYTHING!  Soccer, basketball, karate, co ops, music lessons, etc.  We sat down with the boys and they decided that Karate (Tae Kwon Do) is what they want to be focused on.  Now I don't even have to stress that "when is sign ups, and what do we have to schedule next!".  It's so nice to have our evenings focused on Karate, and nothing else!

I also took back over their piano lessons so it's one less running around.  I get that bonding time with my children, and I've saved us money and time we would have spent running around town.

4) Subscriptions

Yes, I'm THAT mom!  The one who wants to have monthly boxes for EVERYTHING!!  How I'm handling this is I picked ONE that we liked the most and just work on that.  I do a six month subscription, and when that expires I reevaluate to see if we loved it or not.  As our things expired and not renewed, I realized how much we weren't using several of them.  The kids didn't even notice that we don't get some of their boxes every month anymore. 

They are just as content to play legos and do other activities together.  Yes, I love the education and enrichment of it all, but in all honesty, it was more clutter and stress.  I may go back to some or just do one for six months, then another one.  As our boys grow and change, so does their interests.  I'm learning to be content with what we have and not have to have "everything" I see.  This also helps me set that example to my boys.  They are learning to be content with their toys and things they have and not always focused on what "new" things they need. 

Less is More so much of the time!

5) Commitments

Yes, I'm also THAT girl!  The girl who wants to be in every activity, every party, every free community event, etc.  I would push so hard to do "every" experience that it ended up a big jumble of stress that no one appreciated. 

My commitments are now to teaching music (and that is going AMAZING!!), and to my kids education.  I also focus our big experiences for our vacations.  Doing a weekly park day for free instead of doing every event also helps.  It's free, it's consistent, and it's slower paced.  I'm not squeezing it between ten other things, and that has changed our levels of stress a lot.

Re evaluating WHAT and WHO are my priorities makes a difference!! 

6) Results

I have more time for ME:  Bible study, college, teaching.  I have more time for what is important to MY mental health and sanity.

My kids are less stressed with the hustle and bustle of life.

My home is where we spend a lot more time and quality time together.


I know this is not a solution for every family, and I don't think it's wrong to be busy.  I just know for me it becomes an addiction of busy-ness which leads to stress, and long term negative for our family.

I do want to do a lot, but I'm happy with the overall slowed down of our family this year.  Now I just need to make sure as time goes on we don't overwhelm ourselves. 

Another season of life we may become busy again, but for now I'm learning to embrace the quiet.