Corona schooling is NOT homeschooling...

But as a veteran homeschooler I feel like so many need encouragement.  If you need it. Here it is:





At first homeschooling feels hard.  It’s an adjustment, learning you and your children’s learning styles, learning new dynamics, and much more happens that first year

The bonus of homeschooling is we can be there for each other!  Yes, even we have had some hard adjustments (because yes, we are used to lots of friends and field trips and fun)  but here’s a few positive things that may help from my many years of homeschool experience!

First of all realize that you can take days off.  Earlier this week when the weather was perfect and gorgeous, we skipped school that day to just play outside all day.  Some days we just all need a mental health day and need snuggles and movies.  Homeschooling means you can have some flex with your schedule

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Next know that homeschooling can be done in just a couple hours a day.  We spend 1-3 hours a day on our school.  This is vastly different from what you may be used to with them gone 8 hours a day, but a lot of that is routine and classroom management.  It’s ok to realize that you don’t have to be a public school at home.  Just be what you and your children need for your home.




Also remember that there is support!  There are lots of moms who will hug you and remind you that’s it’s ok to have a bad day, it’s okay when they cry about math, and it’s okay to feel overwhelmed.  But we will also be here to remind you that you did amazing with that project last week, you got lots of hugs and smiles when they finally did get it, and you are their mom who is doing amazing and hard things!!

Lastly remember to never compare.   Some people do videos, some do Montessori, some do Charlotte mason, some do unschooling, etc.    It’s not about who is doing it the best or the prettiest.  It’s about YOU doing what YOU and your kids need.  You will eventually find your rhythm.  Your kids will eventually adjust.

Remember to not sweat the small stuff and focus on love, Grace, and character over academics.  In the long run making your kids feel loved and secure will go much further than drilling the alphabet and crying over fractions.  Academics will follow once you have the security and love


You are amazing mama and your kids love you always!

Yes, it feels hard.  It feels hard even for us doing this a while, but we have each others backs and we will get through this all together!!

Quarantine adventures 2020

Now that we have been shelter in place for a couple weeks we are finally falling into a good rhythm.  Our kids are adjusting to a slower life and not quite as upset over no parks, museums, zoos, and play dates.   We have been finding a new love of bike riding, board games, science experiments, and are finally doing all the things I had been too busy to do

I used to do our homeschool and make it epic!!  We did adventures, projects, and lots of hands on fun for several years.  After our daughter died my brain went to mush.  I went into survival mode.  We did school but just the essentials.  I had quit doing the fun and the family time the same.  I went into survival mode.  

We got to the point I could travel and start to have adventures slowly but I was definitely throwing myself into my work.  I’ve loved my job and my business but I knew that I was not giving my kids the 100% mama they had been used to.   This year I decided we needed to slow down.   I downsized my business, refocused into a new life, and started putting my focus back into our homeschool.   Little did I know the whole world would shut down and force me to really put this into action


I’m definitely missing friends and activities, but I’m thankful for the time to spend with my boys.  We spend 2-3 hours a day playing and walking and biking together.  We are star gazing and fort building and movie watching together.  We are creating great memories.  Even through my mental exhaustion I’m glad that this quarantine is allowing me the much needed reset I didn’t know how to give myself.


Down below are a handful of pictures from our relaxed and slowed down few weeks. ;)

Quarantine 2020

So it’s not even fully in swing and I’m already done.

I’m a natural extrovert and being home 24/7 hurts after a week.   But not only staying home has hurt but really it showed a lot of priority. I’ve enjoyed being able to slow down with my kids and do things we otherwise wouldn’t have time to but it does hurt when after a week not a single person reaches out.   It hurts knowing that you love with deep depression and trauma and immune issues and this is life.  The life that makes everyone else panic is my life.

Having your world turned upside down?  That’s my life after child loss.  Having friends ignore you for their own issues (sorry if this comes across selfish). But honestly that’d also life after child loss.  You realize that the people who love and adore you really only love and adore you when you’re happy in life is normal. This isn’t a pity me or I feel bad this is just a small wake up call of how her life is just this way all the time. I have been truly amazed at watching people be a custom to this new way of life that I have forgotten that it’s not normal for everyone else.

I do love our homeschool which is not normal isolation by the way.  I’m thankful we have a close family and can support each other through this. But at the same time part of me always truly believed that the people who say they’re there for each other really aren’t when it comes down to it.




But Quarantine has taught us that our normal life has become much more isolated than we realized over the last couple of years since losing our daughter. We learned that people stepped away when it was uncomfortable, people didn’t like slowing down their life, and people didn’t like being inconvenienced. Even though we’re definitely not isolationist by any means we have a very different life than we used to have a couple of years ago.
I’m writing this all to say it’ll be okay again


Even if your life never goes back to a full normal you can grow through this and things will get to a new normal.


Some ways child loss has truly prepared us for this type of thing as a family. We have learned that the worst things could happen we’ve learned to do it without support because everyone else ran away and we learned that on the hardest days you’ll still make it through in the end



Embrace the good moments.  Read the books.  Enjoy the movies.  Walk the dogs and kids.  Respect the rules but know that it’s not forever.


Also remember that this is some of our normal.  The stress and anxiety and wonder what will happen.  That became our normal for a long time.


It feels surreal to have everyone else go through it now too


You’ll learn where your faith lies.  You’ll learn who your friends are.   You’ll learn where your priorities are


In the end it may it may not go back to normal but you will be forever changed and affected.  Show grace to others.  Show love to those who need it.  Remember your temporary is some of our permanent.  We put money a string face for you but inside it hurts every single day.  And yes we keep keeping on through it all.

Nevertheless, when things got hard, she persisted!

Yesterday I finally walked for my college graduation.  Now, to some this is not a big deal, especially doing this at 32 years old, but for me it is a major achievement. 

WE ALL have our Bachelor's now.  SO proud of the Hartman crew!

When I finished high school 14 years ago, I honestly thought that four years later I would be done with college, ready to start my amazing career and life. If you would have told me that I would have gone through all that I have and not finished until my 30's, I would have felt like a failure.  However, I've learned that it means so much more to me now than it would have 10 years ago.

What I have learned is when things are hard... I have learned to not quit.

At 19, when I first started college I dropped out before my first semester when relationships got hard.  I started again the next year and again quit when life got overwhelming.  At the time I felt like a complete failure, and didn't know what I would ever accomplish.  After I enlisted in the Army I learned that even when I want to quit, and when I physically and mentally am at my end...I can still go on.  When people leave my life, bash my character, and I'm physically drained... I can still do it.

After my first son was born, I realized that I wanted him to have an example to follow.  I decided to go back to school.  Two and a half years into my Nursing program, my husband got sick, life got insane, and I had to stop to take care of our family.  I switched over to a Music program once we settled back down.  I finished my Associate's degree in Music and then realized to get my Bachelor's that I would have to transfer to a very expensive school and it seemed like once again I wouldn't finish this "simple" thing of a Bachelor's degree.

Chelsea, my college mentor

After my daughter was born, I re-enrolled into Online school so I could take classes, take care of my family, and still make a priority of learning and continuing with my goals.  Using WGU (Western Governor's University) I was able to affordably go back to college. 

People ask me "Why get the degree? What are you going to do with it?  Aren't you going to work now?"  Honestly.. I got the degree because I needed to know that I could finish a major thing even with difficult times.  Through the loss of my daughter halfway through this, losing two more babies since her death... taking care of my husband with numerous health scares.. homeschooling... running a music studio.  People ask is it worth it.  People ask if I would do this all again.

Short answer: Yes.

I've learned through loss, devastation, dealing with my own physical health and mental health, that when I set a goal, I can do it.

Now I did not do this all alone.  Many, many times I wanted to give up.  I learned that my mentor with my college gave me lots of encouragement, my husband who kept me going when I wanted to quit, and my amazing three boys who I wanted to see that mom could do the hard things.  They may not understand it all now, but when they grow up, I want them to look back and remember the days that mom took care of them, but also prioritized her own goals.  Mom did not lose herself to depression and anxiety, and trauma.  I want them to grow up and when their life feels impossible, to know that they can do the hard things.  I would get discouraged when I would see my younger brothers accomplish their degrees younger and faster.  I would feel like I would never end when I switched to my third degree plan to find a way to make it work for my family.  BUT, I wasn't a failure, and I didn't give up!

I did it differently than planned, but I did finish.

I'm so incredibly thankful for the amazing help and support I have been given along this journey.  I am SO glad that I never gave up and quit.  Did it go the way I planned?  No.  Would I do it again?  In a heartbeat.

Just remember, that when things get hard, YOU can DO the hard things!!

It may feel impossible in the moment, but step by step it can be done.  Pace yourself, and if it takes you 14 years instead of 4, it's still better than never finishing it at all. 

I went.. SKYDIVING!

I always think of the song "I went Skydiving, I went, rocky mountain climbing,"  but in reality, yes, I do want to always live a life that I lived to the fullest!

Skydiving has been on my list for a WHILE, but every time I went to do it, life seemed to get in the way. My friend and brother were in town, so with John we did a small grown-up getaway and had fun. 

We went to San Antonio, saw the Christmas lights, the River-walk, saw the Nutcracker show, and of COURSE ate at Tower of Americas!  This was all a fun kick off to just enjoy some kid-free time and enjoy adult conversations and weekend.

We decided to take our Northern friend to the beach in Corpus Christi.  Fortunately, there was ALSO a Skydiving place there!  So, not only did I get to go Skydiving, I got to do it with Ocean Views and do it with my friend and my brother!! 

Sometimes life feel overwhelming and hard, but a weekend away makes a huge difference.  Getting time with my husband, getting girl time with my friend, and getting to bond with my brother were all relaxing and well needed getaways.

I'll never get tired of the soothing waves of the Oceans, and I'll definitely want to add Skydiving on my list of amazing things to definitely do again!

Was I nervous?? Oh yes. I was so nervous watching the "how to skydive" videos more than actually doing it.  Once we got in the plane, the views were so spectacular and pretty it felt unreal.  I thought I would be terrified when they opened the doors to jump, but honestly I felt weirdly calm.  It was a very unreal feeling just floating through the air (at 140 mph), and seeing everything so far away!  But, before I got the sensation of "falling to my death" the parachute deployed and we spent five minutes slowly gliding down taking in some incredible views!

Getting back home and relaxing and enjoying Christmas with everyone was great!

Matching Pj's, board games, and just a quiet settled down Holiday break.

I'm so thankful for the refreshing time away we got, and I'm SO glad I finally got to check Skydiving off my bucket

list!

Now, onto more grand adventures!

Christmas break-part 2 (late post)

So after our fun week at the Grand Canyon, the adventures didn't stop!!

We got to go to Carlsbad Caverns, Meteor Crater, Roswell, and finally ended up safely home.

My dream is to one day to the FULL Route 66 road trip, but until then, I embrace the pieces I get to go on back and forth to places.

Carlsbad Caverns was MUCH bigger than I remember going on 8 years ago.  We  took 2 hours hiking down into the caverns.  This was a long process, but definitely worth it!  We got to see incredible formations, and it really gave us an idea of just how deep down we were going into the Caverns.  Once we got to the bottom we spent another hour hiking around the trails, and seeing even more.  After being outdoors for three days at the Canyon, this was a complete opposite, but well worth it.

On the way to the Caverns, we did get to see Meteor Crater!  This is the largest known meteor crater site in the US (maybe the world?  Can't remember).  We couldn't get a good picture that truly shows just how big it is.  2 miles across, and we loved seeing the telescopes to see the items down in the middle.  Learning the history and how they excavated and learned about that site was definitely fun. 

Roswell, NM is of course my favorite "stop and eat" on the way home place.  This is the home of alien sighting!  I love seeing a town full of green aliens everywhere for tourist, eating in the outer space McDonald, and overall just enjoying the myths and fun of their history. 

The memories made from car trips are always my favorite.  Yes, fussy kids, and long days.  But, we also get quality family time, a break from our normal routine, and adventures that some people only dream about.  I can't wait to further our adventures, get even more Jr. Ranger Badges, and eventually, go see the world!!

Christmas break -Part 1 (late post)

This last Christmas "break" was a lot.  It was incredible, amazing, adventurous, and a lot.

We kicked off this EPIC with a road trip to the Grand Canyon.  My mom thankfully went with us because John ended up incredibly sick for several weeks.  We met up with close friends and family and had a lifetime trip!  My kids got to spend a week in the snow, the mountains, and the canyons at the grand Canyon.

Now, I'm spreading this into several parts, because I felt like it was TOO much amazing adventure to put into just one blog post.  This one will be Grand Canyon focused.

Now, a couple years ago, we went to the Grand Canyon on the way to California, and it was incredible!  It was fall, so the colors were breathtaking and the weather was beautiful.  I determined to go back and enjoy it for a few days more.  This time, we decided to make it part of our "Christmas Break" vacation.  The way there we got to explore Bandalier National Monument and see so many mountains and amazing desert views.

While we were at the Grand Canyon, our youngest thought for SURE we were at the North Pole.  :)  He saw Mule deer (which he promptly called reindeer), forest of snow, and incredible views.  Now, you may think, Grand Canyon is hot right??  Arizona in winter, I definitely do not think snow.  I apparently forgot the Grand Canyon is at 6,000 elevation, so yes, lots of snow, and cold.  Even though it wasn't quite what we were expecting, it was incredible to our Texas boys.

They were so enthralled with making "snow babies", snowball fights, hiking through the cold.  Yes, they wore out quickly, so taking three days to slow down and do a couple hours of hiking every day was definitely the way to go.  We stayed at the Grand Canyon (one minutes walk from the Rim), which was so much fun!  We go to come and go as we needed, ate food at the lodge, and spent a lot of quality time with board games, reading, family time, and of course, HIKING!

The last day, Samuel (my oldest), my brother and our friend and I all decided to go down the Bright Angel Trail.  I would HIGHLY recommend doing this in the winter.  It was cold, but the hiking quickly warmed us up.  We had no crowds, no overheating, and plenty of water and snacks.  As we hiked down into the Canyon, we got to see spectacular views the entire morning.  It was so fun to see how the lighting changed constantly, the views as we went down changed, and it was a lot easier than we anticipated.  We ended up meeting lots of random people, having good conversations, and had a once in a lifetime experience for sure!

I'm so glad that as a homeschool mom, I get to share these experiences with my boys.  They don't always enjoy the road trips. or what we do, but I hope that when they look back they see they had amazing adventures in their life and that they look back on these memories fondly.