2 Corinthians 12:6-8King James Version (KJV)
6 For though I would desire to glory, I shall not be a fool; for I will say the truth: but now I forbear, lest any man should think of me above that which he seeth me to be, or that he heareth of me.
7 And lest I should be exalted above measure through the abundance of the revelations, there was given to me a thorn in the flesh, the messenger of Satan to buffet me, lest I should be exalted above measure.
8 For this thing I besought the Lord thrice, that it might depart from me.
Now, this entire sermon all I could think about was "wow, Paul was super awesome" and I never truly think of him having a lot of problems. Yes, he was in jail, shipwrecked, stoned, etc, but it never dawned on me just HOW much he went through and yet he continued to serve God and help minister to others! He is known as one of the BEST missionaries of all time!! Yet, he did not see himself as that, and he daily and constantly struggled.
I struggle a lot with health, and mental problems which for years I have been angry about. It's frustrating when I physically cannot play piano the way my brain knows I should be able to, or when I mentally can't express what I'm thinking and feeling and I overwhelm others. The problem with this thinking is it's always "I, I, I, or Me, me me." My husband reminded me this week, that even with all the struggles I have, I still am able to do above and beyond and I am completely what my family needs from me. I may get frustrated with my limitations, but I often think God must have put them there so I am able to stay humble and under my husband at times. It keeps me gracious with my children because I understand struggles when they struggle. It helps me from taking on too much outside of our family.
These past few weeks I have been struggling physically and emotionally with a lot of things due to my health. I get depressed and frustrated with it, but my husband reminds me frequently that if I were perfectly healthy, I could be unstoppable in any career or field I chose, BUT I would not be the mom and teacher and helper for my family that I am! I am so grateful that I have limitations to keep me in the realm I need to be for my family!
Our goal as parents is to raise our children for God! No matter their career path, as long as they are following what God wants for them, we have succeeded as parents.
I had (and still have) big dreams and goals for my life! They have happened in ways I never would have thought, but I am grateful that God allows me to be home doing what he needs me to be for my family at this point in time. In the future things may change, my health may change, but for now my husband and I are allowed the unique opportunity to both be home full time for our children. The days that gets frustrating I just look back now at Paul. He went through extreme daily trials, but God was able to use him for great things!! I pray that some day when I look back I can say that through the daily trials and hurt, that God was able to use our family for what he needed.
When I feel good I go 110%, which means that my family will not get the mommy and wife that they may need. The days I hurt and am frustrated I can't go out and do more I pray and remember that God has added some limitations to me to keep me where he needs me! He needs me home for now to care for my husband and children with their health. He needs me plugged into ministry without taking over everything. He needs me gracious and toned back!
This song is a blessing for me. It's a great reminder to Stay the Course and follow Christ, even when everything else is hard!
This song is a blessing for me. It's a great reminder to Stay the Course and follow Christ, even when everything else is hard!
This verse is my motto I am striving through God's grace to do daily! In my "me" state, it's so easy to know everything and do too much. This is a great reminder for me on how we should be:
Colossians 4:6King James Version (KJV)
6 Let your speech be always with grace, seasoned with salt, that ye may know how ye ought to answer every man.
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